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  • 論壇廣播臺
    廣播臺右側結束

    主題: 如果有人這么挑釁你,你會怎么辦?

    • あ為誰癡狂ゼ
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    • 發表于:2018/6/22 11:37:38
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    馬上注冊,結交更多好友,享用更多功能,讓你輕松玩轉泰安社區。

    立即注冊。已有帳號? 登錄或使用QQ登錄微信登錄新浪微博登錄

    在我上語文課時,我布置任務后,巡視課堂。

    我看到一少年玩手機游戲,看他玩的正嗨,我故裝作鎮靜。

    然后走到他跟前說到:“好玩不?”

    那同學頭也不抬的說:“好玩啊,別打擾我啊,我馬上就要贏了。”

    瞬間一片寂靜,全班同學都愣了。

    他一抬頭看見我這個老師站在他面前,立馬慌神了。

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    巡警在森林里抓到一個捕狐貍的男子,指控他未經批準擅自捕狐貍違反了《捕獵法》必須罰款。

    男子辯解道:“你這是什么意思,我可沒犯法,這是我的寵物,我只是帶它出來散步!”

    巡警喝斥說:“一派胡言!”

    男子又說:“是真的,它喜歡在森林里玩耍,但只要我一吹口哨,就會回到身邊!”

    巡警有些好奇:“這我倒要看看了。”

    于是把狐貍放進森林……“好,現在我看你如何吹口哨把狐貍叫回來。”

    那男子反問:“狐貍?什么狐貍?”

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    昨晚和媳婦出去吃飯,吃完后叫服務員結賬時,發現我沒帶錢包。

    就對媳婦說:“你來結賬吧。”

    可她說:“錢花完了,以為你帶著。”

    當時那個糗啊,一屋子人看著。

    媳婦讓我在哪等著,她去取。

    沒辦法,這能這樣了。

    過了好一會,這貨回來了。

    還一臉壞笑,對服務員說:“我是來贖他的。”

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    班級一對情侶不知咋回事鬧分手了。

    愚人節的時候,我模仿男生的筆跡給女生寫了封道歉信。

    事后女生回了一封信,然后,然后他們都以為對方主動,就又在一起了。

    我這紅娘,現代的活雷鋒啊!

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    大爺買西紅柿挑了三個到秤盤,攤主秤了下:“一斤半三塊七。” 大爺:“做湯用不那么多。”去掉了最大的西紅柿。攤主,“一斤二兩,三塊。” 正當我想提醒大爺注意秤子時,大爺從容的掏出了七毛錢,拿起剛剛去掉的那個大的西紅柿,扭頭就走了…… 攤主當場就凌亂了,我憋成內傷,把頭扭向一邊……

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